Posted by: marilynmendoza | October 9, 2011

Expect miracles !!!! “Don’t believe in miracles – depend on them.” Laurence J. Peter

I came across this quote and had to find out who this Mr. Peter was and found out he was an educator who invented the Peter Principle — “Everyone rises to their level of incompetence”  I don’t know much about that or management but I do know about miracles. In that he has a good point.  The dictionary defines a miracle as An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God.  I’ve had a lot of those in my life.

On my nineteenth birthday I survived a brutal attack that should have killed me. I survived because of a miracle. I am not sure if it was a miracle that is defined above or because miraculously I knew how to survive but either way I believe in miracles. I think this belief is what kept me sane during my years hiding in closets and behind doors. I believe in the miracle of the human spirit. I believe in the miracle of  holding my newborn baby and the miracle of my dog’s trusting brown eyes. I also believe in the miracle of healing. I believe it because I’ve been there and done that. Well, kind of done that

I sometimes embarrass my grown daughter when I jump up and down and shout yay like a child when I see beauty or am happy. I should act like a mother they say, or what would people think?. I think it is a miracle I see the miracles that the universe gifts us with and am making up for lost time.

I spent too much time in fear and not enough time in joy. I expect miracles every day now and I get them. 

Yesterday I went to a religious service I didn’t want to go to. I was still feeling jet lagged and off-center. I have agoraphobia and will make any excuse to stay home, if not pressed. Healing is not a linear process I am finding. But I now do the active  if have a choice, something I read about in Prevention magazine, one of my bibles and so off I  went.

  The place was not at all sacred looking. It was in what was formerly a night club in a hotel. I wasn’t particularly welcomed except for one miracle I will describe later but there was something happening on that Yom Kippur service I didn’t expect. I felt that there was a higher power who I loved and that power was in that space. Love was in that space. It wasn’t the people, or the building. It was in the ancient prayers of poetry that when read as a group  sparked a fire in my being that said I mattered in the universe and these prayers of forgiveness that were said for over 5000 years was part of my culture. It brought me back to my not so wonderful childhood but in a wonderful way. I remembered the services my mother took me to and it made me think of her and forgive myself for running away from her illness.

 The other miracle was a kiss from the Rabbi’s wife when she asked me if I was a visitor and I told her we had emailed each other. I think she saw a spark in me that felt the miracle of being in a holy space.I can’t describe what was spiritual in that room, just know it was there. I am not a religious person. I can’t see myself joining a religion or group of any kind. In my memoir I said “I’ts not that I don’t like groups, it’s that groups don’t like me” but last night I didn’t care.  I just know a miracle when I feel one. Somehow I expected and depended on one that day.  Aloha


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