Posted by: marilynmendoza | April 6, 2012

What becomes of the broken hearted? They write words of pain and grief –15 Kilos

When a man you think you will marry in months decides to end it without telling you and you know its right but it hurts so much you think you will die, you write to save your life. This man was not a bad man, he was a sick man and his sickness caused him to hurt me. He didn’t want me to cry any more so he left with no words. I cried anyway until my heart felt like ice. It didn’t melt until many years later. Love like you’ve never been hurt, but I can’t cry anymore. This man I wrote about took all my tears, and left me without the 15 kilos (pounds) I had been trying to lose for 15 years.  15 kilo’s, 15 pounds, 15 rivers of tears.

These 15 Kilo’s that melted off my curvy latina body

Are lying in a pool of kaleidoscope pain by your feet

If we were still making love, my hip bones would collide with yours

  clanging like  temple gongs announcing the death of love

These 15 kilo’s  that were the protection of my feelings

Are gone into the dark night where hope resided

I don’t recognize this shape of mine that held your

earthly form deep into its memory


These 15 kilos left me as you did, quickly without notice

How can you notice such a minor thing when the pointed sword tears you to pieces?

You were the judge and jury denying the right of an appeal

vaguely non-committal even during the execution,

These 15 kilos now gone ,leave a skeletal  form like the hollow of my neck in the mirror

Accusing you of forgetting what we were

In the land of the rising sun



  1. sad and powerful

    • thank you. This poem was born through deep pain

      • i can see that. sorry you went though it!

      • Tlhank you, it was meant to be. Now, I love myself enough or am too tired to go near toxic people

      • i hear you!

  2. &your rivers have passed through my morning coffee…:'(

    • Thank you. The soul speaks and only special people can hear it

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